Last #MileStoneExperience before we started to travel around the world was probably the coaching school. Inspired by John, I joined a one-year course to learn how to be a professional coach. Every 3-4 weeks I spent 2-3 days in Krakow getting to know very different approaches and practising all the coaching techniques on myself first, which meant to go through a lot of challenges, life decisions, sometimes even past events to understand them - and myself - better. Every meeting brought new insights, new things to work on, new discoveries about who I am and what I want. All that school could be deemed a huge #MileStoneExperience, but if I have to point out one single moment it will be the interpersonal training, which happened at the beginning of the process. We spent 4 days in a beautiful mountain scenario, observing our own way of communicating, relating to others, reacting, etc. For 4 full days we met in the training room without instructions, just letting things happen. Many hours of silence, broken from time to time by somebody who couldn't stand it anymore. Trainers intervened only when they noticed there is some deeper, therapeutic job to be done. As for me, the trainer kept asking what did I feel and where was it in my body and I kept not being able to really answer that question. Then the weekend came and I finally allowed myself to put the computer aside and stop working during the breaks. To relax and focus on what's going on. That day, when the trainer asked me for the the third time what did I feel I suddenly realized there are a lot of happiness and joy inside me, both in my stomach, for sharing time and space with these particular people. When I said those words loud it was like some heavy curtain fell down, everything become clearer, lighter, I had the feeling I see people around me for the very first time. Some of them told me later they had goose flesh in that very moment.
What happened was that maybe for the first time in my life I was truly here and now. I'm a very future-oriented person, I love planning, creating visions, imagining things. I'm also very good in implementing those plans and making dreams come true. The problem is that often I enjoy more planning something than that something itself. When the dreamt reality comes, I cannot really experience it, because I'm too busy planning what's next.
Andrea, on the other hand, is past-oriented. He lives, or at least used to live, a lot in memories.
The problem is that in both cases we miss life itself. Focusing on what is not there anymore or on what is yet to come prevents us from experiencing the only thing which actually exists – the present. It is not that we cannot plan anymore or learn from past experiences, but even this can be done from being rooted in the here and now first. From seeing and hearing things and people as they really are. The biggest gift we can give to ourselves and to other persons is to truly see and hear them. It happens so rarely.
Since that moment of genuinely being here and now I started to seek for more such experiences. It was a very strong feeling of being fully alive, of seeing more and clearer, of pure happiness and connection. I wanted more of it. I got called by different forms of meditation, I went deeply into the mindfulness concept, we joined various spiritual centres, some of them became #MileStoneExperiences themselves and I will mention them in future posts. I keep seeking for those unique moments of full presence. And this definitely changed my life.