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Time to go


Three and half months in Europe. Too much, it’s already too much. There are a lot of things happening, new contacts, the Changemaker Course is developing more than I’ve ever expected, a lot of presentations. But I feel so strongly that it’s time to start the journey again. Each part of me screams to move, to come back to life. Because what is life for anybody else, for me became only a short break, good for a while, not for long. It’s the same call which made me quit a dream job in Ashoka, all established contacts and opportunities just to be 100% myself, realize myself, every single part of my potential. I miss to be on the way, I miss the unknown, being here and now, discovering something new in every second, I miss deep relations built within minutes, hours. I miss nature, sunsets in the middle of nowhere, I miss life without calendar but with time. I miss the look full of meaning, endless discussions about how to change the world, the excitation coming the second after waking up and fading away only when falling asleep. I miss the simplicity and the truth of life implied in questions which are worth to answer and problems which are worth to solve. I’m tired of Europe, the Western attitude, which seem to me so unreal. More than ever I’m not able to take part in discussions about clothes, shopping, last party, I can’t speak about weather, I’m not interested in smiling because I should do so. A lot of things have changed inside me. I listen more, I see more, I speak less. I’m much more here and now, which made changes in a lot of aspects of my life. I know how it is to live in full agreement with myself. I understand it’s time for new contacts, collaboration opportunities and I look for them with pleasure. Last three months were wonderful, much more than I expected. But it’s enough, just enough. Probably if I stay too long, I will kill this inner voice which screams: go, go! We know each other already, I know that it shouldn’t be killed, but reality is stubborn. It comes with its doubts, advice, wondering when I will start a normal, adult, stable, serious life. Well, dear reality and all of you who wonder about that: this is my normal, adult, serious life. For ever or at least till I change my mind. Is there any more serious life that the one in which I realize myself, fulfill my dreams and change the world for better? A life in which every second has a meaning? In which I feel so absolutely happy? No, there is nothing more serious I can think of.

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